I don't feel at home although I stay and live in a palace. I keep searching where my real home is as I realize that my soul is in deep of longing the reality of myself, "Who am I?" I stay at home but I hardly can breathe well, "Who am I?" In a palace, I can not find myself in the eyes of my families, my servants, my staffs and even in my shadow in the mirror. I am looking at the lotus flowers and I have found the entrance gate. I decided to look for the reality of myself outside this palace. I meet the noblemen and still I can't see myself in their eyes. I meet the beggars in the market streets, I can breathe well although I still can't find myself in their eyes. I hold their hands and feel the glory of their painful lives as I feel it also. At the end of that road, I meet a monk, bald and skinny. I can find myself in his smiles, his skinny body, his simple robe and his eyes. I finally found myself and my breath in a monk. The monk invites me to follow him to his place of tranquility, a palace for a pure soul, who isn't afraid of darkness, the evil and the death. I decide to follow his path and I change my royal robe with my new simple cloth. And this is my first love when I look at the Bodhi trees and all that nature does, they don't live and breathe just for themselves, I myself just do the same. I let myself and my peace are for others' sake. I wish they can find themselves in myself, my life, my breath. The silent Bodhi tree is my teacher, my companion, and my home. The reality of myself is to find peace, deep in my soul, which I have found it finally, eternally. © Emmelia M.
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